Soft Sovereignty
A Love Letter to My Sacred Feminine Reclamation
What is your relationship to the feminine?
Have you ever been praised for your beauty… but silenced for your voice?
Have you ever felt your softness mistaken for weakness…
Or your power mistaken for aggression?
Have you ever been told—through words, stares, systems, or silence—
that your body, your beauty, or your being was something to manage, mask, or explain?
❖ The Early Fragmenting: Innocence & Silencing
As a young girl, I was told I was pretty, but not to speak too much.
“Children are to be seen and not heard,” they said.
And so I learned to quiet my wonder, my words, my wild. I silenced the deeper things that stirred within me — the magical thoughts, the holy feelings, the questions that pulsed like stars.
Even as I received praise for beauty, I longed to be seen beyond it.
I didn’t want to be a doll. I wanted to be a seer, a soul with purpose.
But that version of me wasn’t welcome yet.
❖ When Visibility Feels Like a Threat
By the time I hit preteen years, walking to 7-Eleven to play arcade games,
the catcalls started. The gaze shifted.
The attention didn’t feel flattering. It felt unsafe.
So I began to hide. I began to shrink, to cover, to protect.
My body became something to armor, not honor.
Even in high school—with stages, cheerleading, and theater—it was performance, not presence.
I didn’t embody my truth.
I functioned through my body, but didn’t feel safe within it.
❖ Alpha Era: Trading Softness for Status
In early adulthood, I became a doctor.
When you look younger than your credentials,
you learn to command respect before you’re ready.
I was driven, determined to be taken seriously.
I pushed harder. Memorized more. Projected confidence.
I became the overachiever.
The clever one. The composed one. The one who proved her value.
And in doing so, I amplified masculine energy to navigate a masculine world.
By the time corporate success found me, I was in full “alpha mode.”
I was a trauma doc on TV, leading programs, directing strategy, earning accolades.
But the deeper feminine… the fluid, the receptive, the mystical?
She got buried under alpha-boss brilliance.
I could lead, compete, win — but it never felt like home.
❖ The Softening: Initiation through Love + Loss
A turning point came when a wise woman told me,
“You need to learn to be the girl in the relationship.”
At first, I recoiled.
I resisted.
I had learned that being “the girl” meant being vulnerable, exposed, maybe even preyed upon.
But her words stayed with me.
Something inside me stirred.
Music became a portal. Writing and singing drew forth my sensual, poetic self.
Scent, dance, creative expression… slowly, they coaxed my softness back online.
Then came love. And motherhood.
And I discovered the divine feminine was not a performance.
It was a frequency.
❖ Sacred Motherhood & Self-Reclamation
At 34, pregnant and glowing, my body became temple and teacher.
I transitioned from weightlifting to yin yoga, from control to flow.
A Hypnobirthing course led me inward. Cameras captured the journey — a reality series that became a DVD. (Don’t even get me started on why I thought this was a good idea!)
In becoming a mother, I reparented myself.
Every stage of my daughter’s life reflected back an unhealed version of me.
And in loving her through it…
I learned to forgive myself forward. I learned to meet my wounds with grace.
My journey of returning to my Whole Self included sacred medicine journeys, which helped me weave back what had been splintered.
Ayahuasca in the jungle of Peru. (Not as cliché as it sounds.)
There, I sat with a female medicine woman who didn’t just serve the brew—she embodied the sacred feminine. She was healer and hymn, wisdom keeper and womb mirror. She sang the ceremony alive.
Something in me shifted.
A seed was planted in that resonance—one I didn’t yet know I’d water. Years later, I found myself singing in ceremonies, weaving songs as medicine for women remembering their worth. That night in the jungle, she didn’t give me advice. She gave me permission.
And the fruit of that permission is still ripening.
And so my body — once a battleground — became a vessel of purpose, presence, and flow.
❖ Spiral Sovereignty: Feminine, Fully Claimed
In 2022, fresh from an ayahuasca ceremony, glowing and grief-cleared,
I met my husband. (Ask me about how I connected with his soul before I ever saw him in real life!)
It was no coincidence.
I had stepped into the archetype of Queen.
And in came my King.
Now, at 54, I wore a crop top to the FKA Twigs concert in Prague
and receive admiring glances not as validation…
but as mirror recognition of what was always sacred.
This is not vanity.
This is sovereignty.
Soft. Rooted. Resonant. Whole.
❖ Now, I Ask You:
What is your current relationship with your femininity?
What parts of you were hidden, shamed, or hardened to survive?
What would your body say, if you asked it for forgiveness?
Can you imagine a version of you who receives… without bracing?
Is your femininity finally becoming something you’re ready to reclaim — as your power, your poetry, your birthright?
Are you ready to ritualize your reclamation?
If your womb, your voice, your softness are ready to return home…
✴︎ A Sacred Feminine Retreat is Calling
📍 The Netherlands
🗓️ September 26–30, 2025
🌿 10-week women only prep & integration container
🌀 2 psilocybin truffle ceremonies,
🎶 Live music, somatic ritual, ancestral release
💠 Trauma-informed, sister-held, soul-guided
This is not just a retreat.
It’s an initiation back into the sacred spiral of womanhood.
If your name is written in this circle, you already feel it.
Apply to join us.
Only 8–10 women will be held in this temple.
💠 Final Blessing:
Your softness is not a threat.
Your beauty is not a burden.
Your body is not a battlefield.
Your voice is not too much.
You are divine by design.
And the spiral is calling you home.
With love and sovereignty,
DaeEss 1Dréa
